Rogue's Gallery: Even More Pathetic than Monahan (OSRIC)

I have been playing D&D for 26 years.  I have never had this happen before.

I made an unplayable character.

No really.  He is unplayable.

A dwarf with the following stats:
Str 13, Dex 8, Con 17, Int 14, Wis 14, Cha 3

He cannot be part of any character class under the OSRIC rules as written.

I win.